Thake a Pithure Lady

So I have a burning question.

Why!

I had to go to DI today and there was a girl there working at the checkout and she had all these little pieces of masking tape on her arm. I just maybe thought that she was making little tape loops for a later Laurel lesson or something like that. I was so curious that I said "are you planning to mask something off later? Whats with the tape on your arm?" She started to say (I think this is what she was trying to say) " *I sneezed too clubbing up my thug om my ham". Wow mystery solved she was working at DI because she was sneezing too much had gone out to a club of some kind and now had a speech impediment because a thug did something inappropriate to her ham. Had any of the other workers had any problems with any of their hams? My mind was a flurry. How could I extract myself from the checkout gracefully without catching this sneezing clubbing thing. I was now staring boldly and not speaking because I tried talking and thinking at the same time once and it didn't work out too well so now I can talk or think but not really do both at the same time. She started picking at one of the pieces of tape and scratching it and what do my wandering eyes should appear but a miniature earing lodged in her arm not her ear. I WAS ALMOST AMAZED! She had her arm pierced. Three little studs lined up like little stars on thars. "How did you get those in?" I replied to loudly for the hushed environment of DI. ** "Ab thirst it hurled rail bed" She told me with real pain in her voice. *** "Dow day art hurling dust hissy" We were interrupted by the girl working at the next cashier who whispered to her friend "Megan you better cover those studs in your arm before Dave sees them". So she covers the the studs in her arm with the tape and smiles at me. She smiles a big toothy grin and peaking from between her teeth is a huge tongue ring. I start to ask her if it hurts but I resist and pull myself away. I must get going I need to get to Walmart where I see a guy and all I can think about is a song "Do your ears hang low do they wobble to and fro, can you tie them in a knot can you tie them in a bow. I didn't have any questions for him. Too Scary.

Translations
* I needed to cover up the studs on my arm
** At first it hurt really bad
*** Now they aren't hurting they are just itching

Where will she go

So Elisabeth's papers or electronic information has been sent to a higher level. Where will she go. Please make a stateside guess and a foreign guess. I will make the winner a pie. And I know I still owe Alysha a pie.

I Simply Remember.....

So things just haven't been all that darn funny lately! Jake went on a mission and I miss him terribly. And there have been some other so not funny things. So I have a little trick when I am down or wishing I was happier I try to go to a happy place. This is a place where I store (in the vast expanse of my mind) things that make me laugh or smile.

Here are some of the Highlights in my Happy Box.

Best Church ever: The whole armor of God demonstration with JR Wright trying to keep his shoes perched on the tips of his toes while balancing on the podium wearing a paper plate hat.


I Love this picture of Daren and John riding the quad. Dad is doing all the worrying and John is just having a ball.

How did these boys get so handsome?

Elisabeth and I at the Lame Brook White concert. The mayor had just proclaimed Holy Mesa Brook White Day when Brook said she had a hairball in her throat and couldn't sing any more.
I proudly display my cake I made for Elisabeth's Awsome Office Party
Married 25 years and he is still as Hot as the day I stole his pencils from his back pocket during sophomore registration at Westwood
The prophets went 4 wheeling and haven't been seen since
John had this same smile on his face every time he got to ride the bus to school
I love camp cause me best friends go there
Leslie and Will always make me smile

I love to watch Sarah swim!





Some other items in my little happy box:
Colleen Coleman Come on Down. I kissed Bob Barker's cheek and he didn't even smell like an old man.

The feeling I had when I finished the Catalina Marathon .

My Mom had her temple shoes stolen so on her new pair she wrote "Helen Chapman's shoes Do not steal". Then she knelt down and everybody could see the bottom her shoes.

Daren and I went to Hawaii and we went snorkeling. I saw this really pretty blue fish on the bottom of the little shallow pool we were in and went down to look at it really really close. When I surfaced I looked up and I was looking at this man's fin on his foot and I was sitting in his lap. As I came up he was looking at Daren and his wife and they were all laughing so hard because they had been watching me the whole time.

I am adding to my happy box every time an email or a letter comes from Jake. This makes me so happy.

A few months ago we went to dinner and then played in Jayme Bawden's new house this was so fun. I put this in the happy box too.

I love to laugh with my sisters and Mom.

I loved President Monson's message on the Sunday morning session of conference. He talked about counting your blessings and being happy now instead of putting it off until all is going well.
I simply remember my favorite things, and then I don't feel so bad.
Thank you to all for being my friends
Love Colleen

A Blog-worthy picture indeed

Big Fat Large News















Sarah is a Super, Swifty, Special Swimmer of Spectacular Specifications.
She got first in both of her individual event in the first 3 meets of the year. This is why she is ATHLETE OF THE WEEK. Yea for Sarah!! Sarah's mother is dork however, because she had to go down to the school and take a picture of the marquee.

I'M AN IDIOT AND I HAVE PROOF!

I was watching The Office the other day and I often find myself watching from between my fingers because I am so embarrassed by the stupid things Michael Scott says and does. In one of the episodes he says "I don't understand how someone could be so self unaware. I've decided that I can relate to Michael Scott in this department. Sometimes I even amaze myself!. At what point does the brain go on vacay and there is nobody minding the store upstairs?

Sometimes we say really stupid things and it is out before you can put it back in and you are stuck. Recently someone asked me who my girlie girl doctor was and if I liked him. I said that I did, but I hadn't been since I had a baby and I knew he wouldn't remember me cause he hadn't seen me in a while. Feeling like I may have gotten into muddy waters I tried to correct my oops I then said, "I mean I haven't shown my FACE at that office in a while." Oh forget it, I was just another pretty face to him anyway.

I have done some really stupid things also. One day I was making a cake and I had this mixer that couldn't hold onto it's cord and as I was mixing the cord flopped down into my delicious cherry chip batter. Well I did what anybody would do to clean off the cord. You guessed it I picked up the cord and popped it in my mouth to lick off the cake batter. IT WAS STILL PLUGGED IN! Wow what a bad surprise I was knocked back a little bit and was quite stupid for a while afterward.

With some of those brain cells gone I was able to perform my next act of idiocity (I totally made up that word) Many of you know that I love Coach purses. I like them because they have C's on them like Colleen Coleman. Well I have some real purses and some fake ones. (a lot of fake ones). When one of my real ones got really dirty I decided to wash it in the washing machine like I had done to my tennies. It turned out so good and since I was on a roll I washed one of my fake ones. It did not turn out so good. It turns out that the Chinese fake Coach makers don't guarantee their craftsmanship either. Well they probably don't anyway.














The granddaddy of all the stupid things said was actually a joint project between me and some of my friends. Last year I went to an orchestra concert at Westwood. I was sitting on the back row with Daren and 2 friends. One friend, we will call her Sherrie was sitting to the right of me
Daren was on my left with another friend and we will call her Jeannie sitting next to him. Jeannie's husband was sitting by her but he doesn't get to be in this story because he chickened out like girl and pretended to get a phone call and ran out. OK the scene is set. Between the second to the last and last number Sherrie is looking at the program and on the program is the name Deja Vu as a violin player. Sherrie then says to me "If your last name was Vu do you really think you would want to name your kid Deja?" Then she leans over me and Daren and says to Jeannie "Deja Vu this can't be right who would name their kid Deja Vu?" The lady (oriental looking) in front of Daren turns around and says "I would name a kid Deja Vu because she is my daughter and her name really is Deja." There are no words after that you can only sit there and hope that someone falls off the stage or accidentally impales them self on their cello bow because there is just no recovery after that. She than says "are you people teachers here?" We all mutely shake our heads. Darrel pretends at this point to get his "phone call" and runs out. We just hold our breaths and can't even speak. The concert ends and she huffs out gives one last glare and leaves. We dissolve into peals of laughter and Sherrie reminds me once again that these things were suppose to only happen to me. Sorry Sherrie having a friend who is an idiot apparently rubs off on you.

OK so you can comment and tell your best act of idiocity like a contest. Good luck! The winner gets a prize. (not really) Maybe I will make you a sash to wear or something.


Elisabeth didn't really park here I just liked the picture and it fit the theme.

Don't Hate Me Because I'm Beautiful

I usually don't allow any pictures to be taken of me, but this was just too good. I had to break my own rule so that I could make fun of a person. This time Me!
OK so this morning I woke early to iron Sarah's shirt (picture day), make lunches, go walking, and take picture money to Sarah.
After I walked John to his class I went to Jamba and then I came home.
This is how I looked during all those errands I ran.



















Notice the hair hanging flat to the forehead.
So Elisabeth asks me "Mom what is with your hair are you going to do it today?" Then she says if you need the FLAT IRON it's in my room. Flat Iron really are you kidding me? Do you see how my hair could get any flatter? I have the worlds straightest hair!
So I took the hint.
And.............
One blob of mousse, a blow dryer, two round brushes, two fingers of texture paste, a
teasing comb, and three spritz's of root spray later.














I was ready to meet the day.
This all made possible by the great color and cut Jennifer Anderson gave me last week.

Hope your day doesn't fall flat
Colleen

Some pictures of the Nicest Kids in Town

John took lessons from the best teacher in the city

Joe is way to cool for 6th grade

















Sarah was High Point Winner for Summer City Swimming

John is the best looking and brightest star of Room 1